"O my God, lean down and listen to me. Open your eyes and see our despair....We make this plea, not because we deserve help, but because of your mercy."
- Dan. 9:9, NLT
Mercy: compassion, forgiveness. From a legal standpoint this term indicates an act of pardon. The releasing of an offense to one totally undeserving. We find this in the acts of compassion and grace of God toward his children, and we see it in forms of compassion and grace extended from one human to another.
At some point in our lives we have been rendered the recipient of mercy, not because it was deserved but simply because it was given. That's what mercy is really....a gift. I could write a book on the merciful actions of God and others given on my behalf. You would think it would make me a better person, that it would somehow make me more merciful to others who have offended me....but it sometimes does not. What is it about an offense that makes me just want to get even? Why do I want to punish the offender...make them pay as it were? Why do I still tend to nurse an unforgiving heart when I have been shown so much mercy in my life?
What is wrong with me?!! It is a self-righteous spirit that rears its' ugly head when I'm wronged. I have a bent toward a..."See, I told you so" attitude. Yet, I know my own weaknesses, my own failings, my own dark secrets. I think it makes me feel superior to the one in request of my mercy. They wronged me, I lost sleep over it, so now I am going to dangle them over the fire a little bit and then forgive them later....make them sweat a little just so they know how much it hurts....is it just me that does this? Am I the only tainted saint out there? What to do about this?
First, I am in need of forgiveness for being like this. There's a heart problem, big time. I need God....I need God because I am sick. My disease is sin. I need God to live through me for it is not in my nature to be compassionate....I need his compassion. It is not in me to be forgiving, I need his forgiveness. I don't know how to be merciful....I need his mercy. My flesh screams for justice when I am hurt by another....but my sense of justice is a far cry from God's. I need God. Period!!
The other side is I also know what it means to dangle over the fire by anothers' resistance to be merciful to me. I have offended many. I have hurt many. Some may never forgive. I know what it's like to lose sleep over my sinning against God and others. Chances are you do to. Being unmerciful is such a burden to carry. It isn't God's way for us.
What if God responded to me as I have responded to others regarding being merciful? What if I prayed, asked him to lean near and hear my cry of despair, my plea for mercy and he said, "No"? A man most miserable you wouldn't find anywhere than that. But he doesn't. His forgiveness, his mercy is without limitations and without conditions. He extends to us what we absolutely don't deserve. Does he discipline? Yes. The Word of God says he disciplines those whom he loves. But even his discipline is an act of mercy. He fights for our attention through his mercy. He won't give up on us. Even when we are in the fires of our own bad choices, He purges us, cleanses us. What a loving God!
I need a God-like character. Only he can give that to me. I pray when I die one of the things said of me is that I was compassionate, that I was freely forgiving....without limitations and without conditions. It is my prayer that whether I am bumped by blessing or offense all that flows from my heart is the love of Christ.I have a way to go on learning this lesson. Maybe I am the only one who struggles with this. If I am, put me on your prayer list for I desperately need it!
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
The Raging War Within
Rain, pouring rain....the palm leaves weren't enough to slow it down or provide any shelter. Waiting.....waiting for the first wave of attack. My buddy, Alan, and I were the first line of defense in protecting the perimeter of our camp......drowning in the pool of water we now crouched in. We were in blackout mode....attack was imminent. Question was...where were they going hit us first?
They hit! Came out of nowhere it seemed. Fire flashes from their M-16's lit up the night. For about ten minutes it was nothing but chaos! We dug in and did our best to stave off the enemy from penetrating our quadrant. We were successful, but Alan was hit in the process. How I dodged a bullet is beyond me!
So it is with war and war training. No one really got hit, or wounded, or died in the fire fight. It was military training. Our enemy was the Philippine National Army and they were teaching us Air Force guys how to defend an airfield under attack. They were good, very good. Even with equipment like night vision goggles, they still hit us out of nowhere! How could that happen? Needless to say, our commanding officer wasn't too pleased. So we did it again, and again, and again....until we got it right.
In my walk with God I have come to realize firsthand how relentless the enemy is in attacking my faith and hurting my relationship with the Lord. He comes, it seems, out of nowhere. A sneak attack that totally catches me off guard. Oh I have the equipment....the latest translation and study bible, the benefit of great preaching on Sunday, Christian friends who are an encouragement to me, a prayer life...all the latest equipment...and yet he still comes out of nowhere and makes my life a chaotic hell. How does that happen?
I mean, I do all the right things, go all the right places, study all the good things, hang out with good people...and still he attacks and murders me as if there were no preparation at all, no faith at all. And the worst of it.....I hear him laugh as he walks away.
I don't have all the answers for this. I do have a thought or two. First, the Word of God says that our enemy walks about like a ravenous lion seeking whom he may devour. When you get into the language there you realize that he wants to tear us to pieces! He wants to destroy us! He wants to murder us, kill us again and again!! See, he isn't just a little miffed about his situation, he is angry beyond angry about it. He's already lost...it isn't a question of if, but a matter of when. He hates God and he hates God's people. He will stop at nothing to ruin God's work here on earth by ruining God's people.
I don't think I fully get that sometimes. He wants to destroy me. Render me useless in the kingdom of God. He wants to destroy God given relationships in my life. He wants to disgrace me, humiliate me, shame me, guilt me, and kill me. Even with all the equipment I have to fight him with, I don't think I take his hate for me seriously enough and I get caught off guard. He comes out of nowhere and attacks me at my most vulnerable spot. He knows what my kryptonite is! I feel I take him too lightheartedly. And that is when he hits.
Second, Paul talked about the war on the inside with his two natures. He said something to the effect of,..."the things I shouldn't do, I do....and the things I should do, I don't." He understood that even with this new nature inside, the Jesus in us, there was still that bent toward sin, toward selfishness, toward evil, toward shaking a fist at God and going our own way. It's there, it's ever present, and it's ours for life. But the deal is, it doesn't have to live big in us. We have been given help and our help is more powerful than our enemy. Something I have to tell myself on a daily basis or I will stumble and fall on a daily basis.
For me, it is a constant raging war within. If you can live without that fight, more power to you. But also for me, that war assures me of whose side I'm on. When the enemy attacks with doubts of salvation, and he does, I look at the fight....I look at where I'm dug in, and whose camp I'm defending. I'm on the right side alright....so if I never get a break....I will go out fighting...and I will fight again, and again, and again....until I get it right....on the right side!
How about you? Done any fighting lately?
"We faithfully preach the truth. God's power is working within us. We use the weapons of righteousness in the right hand for attack and in the left hand for defense." -2 Cor. 6:7, NLT
They hit! Came out of nowhere it seemed. Fire flashes from their M-16's lit up the night. For about ten minutes it was nothing but chaos! We dug in and did our best to stave off the enemy from penetrating our quadrant. We were successful, but Alan was hit in the process. How I dodged a bullet is beyond me!
So it is with war and war training. No one really got hit, or wounded, or died in the fire fight. It was military training. Our enemy was the Philippine National Army and they were teaching us Air Force guys how to defend an airfield under attack. They were good, very good. Even with equipment like night vision goggles, they still hit us out of nowhere! How could that happen? Needless to say, our commanding officer wasn't too pleased. So we did it again, and again, and again....until we got it right.
In my walk with God I have come to realize firsthand how relentless the enemy is in attacking my faith and hurting my relationship with the Lord. He comes, it seems, out of nowhere. A sneak attack that totally catches me off guard. Oh I have the equipment....the latest translation and study bible, the benefit of great preaching on Sunday, Christian friends who are an encouragement to me, a prayer life...all the latest equipment...and yet he still comes out of nowhere and makes my life a chaotic hell. How does that happen?
I mean, I do all the right things, go all the right places, study all the good things, hang out with good people...and still he attacks and murders me as if there were no preparation at all, no faith at all. And the worst of it.....I hear him laugh as he walks away.
I don't have all the answers for this. I do have a thought or two. First, the Word of God says that our enemy walks about like a ravenous lion seeking whom he may devour. When you get into the language there you realize that he wants to tear us to pieces! He wants to destroy us! He wants to murder us, kill us again and again!! See, he isn't just a little miffed about his situation, he is angry beyond angry about it. He's already lost...it isn't a question of if, but a matter of when. He hates God and he hates God's people. He will stop at nothing to ruin God's work here on earth by ruining God's people.
I don't think I fully get that sometimes. He wants to destroy me. Render me useless in the kingdom of God. He wants to destroy God given relationships in my life. He wants to disgrace me, humiliate me, shame me, guilt me, and kill me. Even with all the equipment I have to fight him with, I don't think I take his hate for me seriously enough and I get caught off guard. He comes out of nowhere and attacks me at my most vulnerable spot. He knows what my kryptonite is! I feel I take him too lightheartedly. And that is when he hits.
Second, Paul talked about the war on the inside with his two natures. He said something to the effect of,..."the things I shouldn't do, I do....and the things I should do, I don't." He understood that even with this new nature inside, the Jesus in us, there was still that bent toward sin, toward selfishness, toward evil, toward shaking a fist at God and going our own way. It's there, it's ever present, and it's ours for life. But the deal is, it doesn't have to live big in us. We have been given help and our help is more powerful than our enemy. Something I have to tell myself on a daily basis or I will stumble and fall on a daily basis.
For me, it is a constant raging war within. If you can live without that fight, more power to you. But also for me, that war assures me of whose side I'm on. When the enemy attacks with doubts of salvation, and he does, I look at the fight....I look at where I'm dug in, and whose camp I'm defending. I'm on the right side alright....so if I never get a break....I will go out fighting...and I will fight again, and again, and again....until I get it right....on the right side!
How about you? Done any fighting lately?
"We faithfully preach the truth. God's power is working within us. We use the weapons of righteousness in the right hand for attack and in the left hand for defense." -2 Cor. 6:7, NLT
Saturday, July 31, 2010
The Wal-Mart Deli Counter
How in the world did I get home with a pound of pickle loaf lunch meat and a half pound of baby Swiss cheese?! What a "delicious" combination! I know I ordered smoked turkey and Colby cheese. I know I did! I repeated my order twice to the lady behind the deli counter at Wal-Mart. Twice she repeated the order back to me. How did this snafu happen? How can a person look you in the eye, take an order, repeat it back to you twice, and still get it completely wrong? I would never order pickle loaf...I think I might be allergic....plus, it just looks gross. Maybe I'm just allergic to the way it looks. Yuck!
I'm not unique to this type of incident. Perhaps you've never had this experience at the Wal-Mart deli counter, but you've had an experience where you placed an order of some kind and the end result was totally wrong. This is why I'm still gun-shy about going through a fast food drive- thru! You know what they do to you in the drive-thru!!
I'm a former retail manager and one reason I know customers don't return for a second visit is because the first one was met with such inattentive service. We are an impatient lot; we want what we want when we want it and we want it right....the first time. Retail establishments who can't meet with that demand lose business!
When it comes to living a life that glorifies God, I'm a lot like the lady behind the deli counter at Wal-Mart. I know what God says through his Word but do I really listen to it?.... And by "listening" I'm talking about hearing with faith that results in obedience. It seems to me you can't separate faith and obedience. If you have faith it will shine through an obedient life. An obedient life that blesses God cannot be demonstrated apart from faith. It is our stubbornness, (of which I could write a book about my own), that keeps us from entering into the full life Christ said he came to give.
It's like God goes to the deli counter...gives his order... I look at him like I'm listening...I repeat his order back to him twice...and he still walks away with something from me totally different. Did he get his own order wrong? Hardly!... I just didn't listen. I fell short of his expectations. I just looked at him with that 'deer in headlights' glaze. I just went through the motions. I was inattentive to what he was really saying and as a result....I missed it...his blessing...his satisfaction...his walking away from my counter whistling a happy tune....his, "Well, done".
How many times in my life have I missed the true blessing of God because I had ears to hear, but didn't listen?! How many times have you?
"To those who listen to my teaching, more understanding will be given, and they will have an abundance of knowledge. But for those who are not listening, even what little understanding they have will be taken away from them." -Matt. 13:12 NLT
I'm not unique to this type of incident. Perhaps you've never had this experience at the Wal-Mart deli counter, but you've had an experience where you placed an order of some kind and the end result was totally wrong. This is why I'm still gun-shy about going through a fast food drive- thru! You know what they do to you in the drive-thru!!
I'm a former retail manager and one reason I know customers don't return for a second visit is because the first one was met with such inattentive service. We are an impatient lot; we want what we want when we want it and we want it right....the first time. Retail establishments who can't meet with that demand lose business!
When it comes to living a life that glorifies God, I'm a lot like the lady behind the deli counter at Wal-Mart. I know what God says through his Word but do I really listen to it?.... And by "listening" I'm talking about hearing with faith that results in obedience. It seems to me you can't separate faith and obedience. If you have faith it will shine through an obedient life. An obedient life that blesses God cannot be demonstrated apart from faith. It is our stubbornness, (of which I could write a book about my own), that keeps us from entering into the full life Christ said he came to give.
It's like God goes to the deli counter...gives his order... I look at him like I'm listening...I repeat his order back to him twice...and he still walks away with something from me totally different. Did he get his own order wrong? Hardly!... I just didn't listen. I fell short of his expectations. I just looked at him with that 'deer in headlights' glaze. I just went through the motions. I was inattentive to what he was really saying and as a result....I missed it...his blessing...his satisfaction...his walking away from my counter whistling a happy tune....his, "Well, done".
How many times in my life have I missed the true blessing of God because I had ears to hear, but didn't listen?! How many times have you?
"To those who listen to my teaching, more understanding will be given, and they will have an abundance of knowledge. But for those who are not listening, even what little understanding they have will be taken away from them." -Matt. 13:12 NLT
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Here I Am!
"Suddenly the Lord called out, "Samuel!" "Yes?" Samuel replied. "What is it?" He got up and ran to Eli, "Here I am. Did you call me?" - I Samuel 3: 4,5a NLT
As a young boy, I remember my mother telling me the story of Samuel. He was a special gift to Hannah, his mother,... an answered prayer. Hannah was childless and she bitterly wept before the Lord in His tabernacle over her condition. She made a vow to God that if He blessed her with a son, she would give him back to God for service to Him. God heard her prayer and Samuel was born. Samuel means, "I asked the Lord for him." Mom would then tell of the wonderful and powerful ways God used Samuel to judge Israel for 40 years. He annointed kings and was the voice of God to Israel.
Then she would tell me that when I was born, she and Dad dedicated me to the Lord's service, just in the same way Hannah did Samuel. Oh, they didn't dump me off at the church when I was three and leave me there, which I'm glad because that church building would have been a pretty scary place to live for a three year old!.... but in the same spirit they dedicated me to God's service.They prayed and believed God would use me in ministering to others, in whatever way that translated to reality. No pressure!
In many ways, as I reflect back on my life, I see a sensitivity that kept me close to God, always thinking in terms of helping others, always looking for the spiritual in things, and always seeing God's hand in everything. When I was younger, simple prayers of faith were easy to pray. When I was younger, a trusting zeal for the Lord was constantly present. When I was younger, I readily shared my faith regardless of how I would be received. When I was younger, loving others seemed almost natural and came without much effort. Oh, to have now what I had when I was younger!!
What happened to me? Where did I veer to the left when I should have veered to the right? How did I go from a hot heart for the Lord to a cold heart for the Lord?!....a lukewarm heart for the Lord at best. Life happened, bad decisions made, failed marriages, straying from the Lord repeatedly and returning to the Lord repeatedly. My life had become, it seemed, a piggy bank collection of sins and failures...the scars and wounds of which eventually kept me from feeling even worthy to say, "Here I am" when He called my name. Amazingly, I could still hear Him call my name. What could I offer from the rubble of my life that could possibly encourage another fellow struggler? So for a time I retreated from any kind of service to the Lord.....just went through the motions. I thought all that was left was to count the coins of sin and failure I had collected in my piggy bank. And life would not get any better, so I might as well deal with is as it was and live with it.
For the last month I have been wrestling with this. Hearing His call and arguing that He should call somebody else. How crippling a sense of unworthiness is! There truly is nothing worthy in and of myself to be used of God....to be used by Him. But He calls because of the Jesus in me who has redeemed me completely. He calls because He still has plans and a work for me to do. God just sees me differently than I see myself. He knows I am not the sum total of my sins and failures. They do not define who I am as far as God is concerned. I am defined by the Christ who shed His precious blood for my salvation...and God has vowed to continue to rescue me....from myself among others crippling entities. That's what the word salvation literally means, "to rescue." He has rescued me relentlessly all my life!
This morning I read again the account of little Samuel. Flooding in came memories of my childhood. Memories of a loving father and mother who faithfully prayed over their little boy and who still faithfully pray over their little boy....always believing the very best God has for me. Always seeing the potential in me when I am rock solid in my walk with the Lord. This morning, weeping, I said again to God....at the ripe old age of 51...."Here I Am!"
As we age we live long enough to experience both joy and disappointment, it is as certain as death and taxes. How we deal will determine the level of inner peace we all instinctively seek and desire. I am living testament that peace doesn't exist apart from God. Going my own way may sound brave and it may make for great song writing, but the reality is that path leads to just more crippling disappointment. And it keeps us from having a hot heart for the Lord.
Why write such a confession on this blog? Because I am convinced at least one out there who reads this will identify and relate to it. You have been where I have been. The pathway to Heaven is littered with fallen brothers and sisters who have once said, "Here I am." but now have lost hope. They need to know the relentless grace of God again. They need to know He still calls their name. They need to know they can smash that horrid piggy bank and start fresh regardless their age. We are called by God to help them....who more qualified than one who has been there in the ditch too? It is such a freeing thing to say, "Here I am!"
As a young boy, I remember my mother telling me the story of Samuel. He was a special gift to Hannah, his mother,... an answered prayer. Hannah was childless and she bitterly wept before the Lord in His tabernacle over her condition. She made a vow to God that if He blessed her with a son, she would give him back to God for service to Him. God heard her prayer and Samuel was born. Samuel means, "I asked the Lord for him." Mom would then tell of the wonderful and powerful ways God used Samuel to judge Israel for 40 years. He annointed kings and was the voice of God to Israel.
Then she would tell me that when I was born, she and Dad dedicated me to the Lord's service, just in the same way Hannah did Samuel. Oh, they didn't dump me off at the church when I was three and leave me there, which I'm glad because that church building would have been a pretty scary place to live for a three year old!.... but in the same spirit they dedicated me to God's service.They prayed and believed God would use me in ministering to others, in whatever way that translated to reality. No pressure!
In many ways, as I reflect back on my life, I see a sensitivity that kept me close to God, always thinking in terms of helping others, always looking for the spiritual in things, and always seeing God's hand in everything. When I was younger, simple prayers of faith were easy to pray. When I was younger, a trusting zeal for the Lord was constantly present. When I was younger, I readily shared my faith regardless of how I would be received. When I was younger, loving others seemed almost natural and came without much effort. Oh, to have now what I had when I was younger!!
What happened to me? Where did I veer to the left when I should have veered to the right? How did I go from a hot heart for the Lord to a cold heart for the Lord?!....a lukewarm heart for the Lord at best. Life happened, bad decisions made, failed marriages, straying from the Lord repeatedly and returning to the Lord repeatedly. My life had become, it seemed, a piggy bank collection of sins and failures...the scars and wounds of which eventually kept me from feeling even worthy to say, "Here I am" when He called my name. Amazingly, I could still hear Him call my name. What could I offer from the rubble of my life that could possibly encourage another fellow struggler? So for a time I retreated from any kind of service to the Lord.....just went through the motions. I thought all that was left was to count the coins of sin and failure I had collected in my piggy bank. And life would not get any better, so I might as well deal with is as it was and live with it.
For the last month I have been wrestling with this. Hearing His call and arguing that He should call somebody else. How crippling a sense of unworthiness is! There truly is nothing worthy in and of myself to be used of God....to be used by Him. But He calls because of the Jesus in me who has redeemed me completely. He calls because He still has plans and a work for me to do. God just sees me differently than I see myself. He knows I am not the sum total of my sins and failures. They do not define who I am as far as God is concerned. I am defined by the Christ who shed His precious blood for my salvation...and God has vowed to continue to rescue me....from myself among others crippling entities. That's what the word salvation literally means, "to rescue." He has rescued me relentlessly all my life!
This morning I read again the account of little Samuel. Flooding in came memories of my childhood. Memories of a loving father and mother who faithfully prayed over their little boy and who still faithfully pray over their little boy....always believing the very best God has for me. Always seeing the potential in me when I am rock solid in my walk with the Lord. This morning, weeping, I said again to God....at the ripe old age of 51...."Here I Am!"
As we age we live long enough to experience both joy and disappointment, it is as certain as death and taxes. How we deal will determine the level of inner peace we all instinctively seek and desire. I am living testament that peace doesn't exist apart from God. Going my own way may sound brave and it may make for great song writing, but the reality is that path leads to just more crippling disappointment. And it keeps us from having a hot heart for the Lord.
Why write such a confession on this blog? Because I am convinced at least one out there who reads this will identify and relate to it. You have been where I have been. The pathway to Heaven is littered with fallen brothers and sisters who have once said, "Here I am." but now have lost hope. They need to know the relentless grace of God again. They need to know He still calls their name. They need to know they can smash that horrid piggy bank and start fresh regardless their age. We are called by God to help them....who more qualified than one who has been there in the ditch too? It is such a freeing thing to say, "Here I am!"
Saturday, June 5, 2010
Letting Go
So Joseph sent his brothers off, and as they left, he called after them,"Don't quarrel about all this along the way!" - Gen. 45:24 NLT
It had been decades since his brothers last saw him. And for decades they carried a deep, dark secret of deception. Now they stood before him, trembling with fear. No doubt wondering how they would be paid back for their crime against their brother. All the dramatic telling of how Joseph was reunited with his brothers and later with his father oozes with the theme of true forgiveness. In fact, it is one of the best demonstrations of forgiveness in the Bible.
Perhaps Joseph knew that his siblings may have the temptation to point fingers at one another on their way back home regarding who was really at fault in what they did to him. Maybe he was concerned they would argue as to how to explain Joseph's situation to Jacob. Would they have to tell Dad they actually sold their brother into slavery? Would they have to tell Dad the blood stained robe and the story that went with it was all a lie? So much time had passed that perhaps they actually believed the lie they told their Dad about Joseph's fate. But not anymore. The reality of their deception was slapping them full in the face. It was time to come clean.
If anyone in the Bible had the right to be vengeful, spiteful, and unforgiving it would've been Joseph. Sold into slavery by his own brothers, falsely accused of trying to rape his master's wife, and thrown into prison, forgotten by all but God. I don't know if I would've come out of all that without feeling just a smidge bitter. But bitterness wasn't Joseph's first thought. His first thought was love. His first action was forgiveness. He saw the whole of his life and saw that in all that happened to him, it was intended for good by a sovereign God. Through him God preserved two nations, Egypt and Israel.
For Joseph, it wasn't a time of revenge. It was a time of letting go. It was time to reunite the family. To help them, to love them. With a word, Joseph could have put his brothers to death for what they had done. Instead, he forgave, he let it go....completely, without one twinge of grudge. Then he blessed them!
When others hurt me often my first thought is retaliation. I just want to get even, hurt them back so they can feel what they made me feel. I want to make them eat dirt! That path is so much easier than forgiving. Forgiving takes a literal act of the will. It is an unnatural act that requires supernatural empowerment. I can say, "I forgive you" all day long to someone who has offended me and still go around carrying anger and a "get even" spirit toward the offender. Is that true forgiveness? In a word, I don't think so. Perhaps it is the absence of that inner anger and "get even" spirit toward the offender that indicates real forgiveness has come home to stay.
Exercising forgiveness is often painful but always necessary if we are to grow in Christ. I have much growth ahead of me I'm afraid. Jesus taught that we should forgive our offenders so consistently that being forgiving defines us. When we are bumped hard by someone the first thing that spills out of us is forgiveness. I do that so consistently inconsistently! Yet, we are never more like our Lord than when we forgive those who have hurt us.
I have been offended and I have been the offender. I have been asked to forgive and have found it necessary to seek forgiveness. Such a position makes me a perfect pupil for the school of forgiveness. To learn more, to be more consistent in exercising it, to make it the theme of my life. Like Joseph, I want to, truly want to learn to let go! Man, there is so much freedom in that!!
Blessings!
"The only revenge which is essentially Christian is that of retaliating by forgiveness."
-F. W. Robertson
It had been decades since his brothers last saw him. And for decades they carried a deep, dark secret of deception. Now they stood before him, trembling with fear. No doubt wondering how they would be paid back for their crime against their brother. All the dramatic telling of how Joseph was reunited with his brothers and later with his father oozes with the theme of true forgiveness. In fact, it is one of the best demonstrations of forgiveness in the Bible.
Perhaps Joseph knew that his siblings may have the temptation to point fingers at one another on their way back home regarding who was really at fault in what they did to him. Maybe he was concerned they would argue as to how to explain Joseph's situation to Jacob. Would they have to tell Dad they actually sold their brother into slavery? Would they have to tell Dad the blood stained robe and the story that went with it was all a lie? So much time had passed that perhaps they actually believed the lie they told their Dad about Joseph's fate. But not anymore. The reality of their deception was slapping them full in the face. It was time to come clean.
If anyone in the Bible had the right to be vengeful, spiteful, and unforgiving it would've been Joseph. Sold into slavery by his own brothers, falsely accused of trying to rape his master's wife, and thrown into prison, forgotten by all but God. I don't know if I would've come out of all that without feeling just a smidge bitter. But bitterness wasn't Joseph's first thought. His first thought was love. His first action was forgiveness. He saw the whole of his life and saw that in all that happened to him, it was intended for good by a sovereign God. Through him God preserved two nations, Egypt and Israel.
For Joseph, it wasn't a time of revenge. It was a time of letting go. It was time to reunite the family. To help them, to love them. With a word, Joseph could have put his brothers to death for what they had done. Instead, he forgave, he let it go....completely, without one twinge of grudge. Then he blessed them!
When others hurt me often my first thought is retaliation. I just want to get even, hurt them back so they can feel what they made me feel. I want to make them eat dirt! That path is so much easier than forgiving. Forgiving takes a literal act of the will. It is an unnatural act that requires supernatural empowerment. I can say, "I forgive you" all day long to someone who has offended me and still go around carrying anger and a "get even" spirit toward the offender. Is that true forgiveness? In a word, I don't think so. Perhaps it is the absence of that inner anger and "get even" spirit toward the offender that indicates real forgiveness has come home to stay.
Exercising forgiveness is often painful but always necessary if we are to grow in Christ. I have much growth ahead of me I'm afraid. Jesus taught that we should forgive our offenders so consistently that being forgiving defines us. When we are bumped hard by someone the first thing that spills out of us is forgiveness. I do that so consistently inconsistently! Yet, we are never more like our Lord than when we forgive those who have hurt us.
I have been offended and I have been the offender. I have been asked to forgive and have found it necessary to seek forgiveness. Such a position makes me a perfect pupil for the school of forgiveness. To learn more, to be more consistent in exercising it, to make it the theme of my life. Like Joseph, I want to, truly want to learn to let go! Man, there is so much freedom in that!!
Blessings!
"The only revenge which is essentially Christian is that of retaliating by forgiveness."
-F. W. Robertson
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Remembering
I am always honored and touched when I attend church on Memorial Day weekend because it never fails that Armed Forces Veterans are recognized for their contribution to the safekeeping of our Nation's freedoms that each American enjoys. I well up with tears and truly am proud that I had the privilege of serving my country in the United States Air Force from December 1984 to February 1990 with an added reserve commitment until December 1992. I obligated eight years of my life to military duty.
I experienced many events during those years from joyful to tragic, peaceful to violent, and secure to unsure. Some experiences I remember with fondness and still talk about them today. Some experiences to this day I find very difficult to talk about at all. But I am glad I can say I did my part. I gave some of my life to become part of a fraternity of men and women who made personal sacrifices for the good of the country they love.
I gave some of my life....there are some that gave all of their life. They are the ones who literally laid down their lives for our freedoms here in America.....it is to these that make Memorial Day a day for remembering. It is to these we honor their ultimate sacrifice. Because of them and what they gave up, Memorial Day is more than a family cookout and a day off from work. To those who gave all I offer my gratitude and tribute.
On this day I also remember another who gave all. My Lord Jesus when he sacrificed himself on a cross for my spiritual freedom. Ephesians 2:4 starts with, "But God, who is rich in mercy....that word rich can be exchanged with the word exhaustless. So it could be read, "But God, who is exhaustless in mercy....I could not out-sin the far reaches of his mercy no matter how hard I tried. When I run away from him, no matter how far....when I stop, his love is waiting for me there. No matter what I do and no matter how hideous to others my sin may be....God's mercy toward me is exhaustless. What a blessing, what a privilege, what a Saviour!
Jesus gave all, I gave none. The first three verses of Ephesians 2 tell us what we were before God intervened with his mercy in verse four. We weren't pretty and there was nothing in and of ourselves that was redeemable. In other words, nothing in us was good enough to merit and win God's favor. I had nothing to give God in exchange for my salvation. It was all of him. I couldn't work my way to heaven because even my good works were filthy to this holy God
God so loved us he gave his only son that we may have fellowship with him. It was all of him and none of us. So I remember also with gratitude that at the age of fourteen God called me out of my darkness and into his light. Jesus became my Saviour and I became a part of God's family. I received my spiritual freedom. I gained Christ and heaven.
Remember to take time and remember the sacrifices made for your personal freedoms and the freedom of the country in which you live from those who gave all to buy it. And remember your spiritual freedoms that came from the sacrifice of the One who gave all.
Memorial Day blessings to everyone!
I experienced many events during those years from joyful to tragic, peaceful to violent, and secure to unsure. Some experiences I remember with fondness and still talk about them today. Some experiences to this day I find very difficult to talk about at all. But I am glad I can say I did my part. I gave some of my life to become part of a fraternity of men and women who made personal sacrifices for the good of the country they love.
I gave some of my life....there are some that gave all of their life. They are the ones who literally laid down their lives for our freedoms here in America.....it is to these that make Memorial Day a day for remembering. It is to these we honor their ultimate sacrifice. Because of them and what they gave up, Memorial Day is more than a family cookout and a day off from work. To those who gave all I offer my gratitude and tribute.
On this day I also remember another who gave all. My Lord Jesus when he sacrificed himself on a cross for my spiritual freedom. Ephesians 2:4 starts with, "But God, who is rich in mercy....that word rich can be exchanged with the word exhaustless. So it could be read, "But God, who is exhaustless in mercy....I could not out-sin the far reaches of his mercy no matter how hard I tried. When I run away from him, no matter how far....when I stop, his love is waiting for me there. No matter what I do and no matter how hideous to others my sin may be....God's mercy toward me is exhaustless. What a blessing, what a privilege, what a Saviour!
Jesus gave all, I gave none. The first three verses of Ephesians 2 tell us what we were before God intervened with his mercy in verse four. We weren't pretty and there was nothing in and of ourselves that was redeemable. In other words, nothing in us was good enough to merit and win God's favor. I had nothing to give God in exchange for my salvation. It was all of him. I couldn't work my way to heaven because even my good works were filthy to this holy God
God so loved us he gave his only son that we may have fellowship with him. It was all of him and none of us. So I remember also with gratitude that at the age of fourteen God called me out of my darkness and into his light. Jesus became my Saviour and I became a part of God's family. I received my spiritual freedom. I gained Christ and heaven.
Remember to take time and remember the sacrifices made for your personal freedoms and the freedom of the country in which you live from those who gave all to buy it. And remember your spiritual freedoms that came from the sacrifice of the One who gave all.
Memorial Day blessings to everyone!
Friday, May 21, 2010
The Uglies!
They swarmed around him. Everywhere he went, they were there! The lame, the blind, the deaf, the prostitutes, the tax collectors, ....all the refuse of society, they seemed to surround him. And he seemed more comfortable with them than the church goers. He touched them. The church goers criticized him.
He spoke against the church goers. Said they had a religion that was empty. .....as he put it....full of dead men's bones. No heart, no soul. That made them mad! They plotted to kill him! Jesus, this is Jesus! This is the Son of God we're talking about. He accepted everyone as they were,....and loved them....got nailed for it. In fact, at points...the Word says he wept over them. Imagine, weeping over the refuse of society. He did it!
It amazes me how religion and faith get confused sometimes. You'd think they go together. They mix like oil and water most of the time. Especially when we talk about the Uglies! You know the uglies, all those people that don't measure up to our spiritual standards....hey, let's go further than that....even those people that don't "smell"acceptable. We look at them and immediately think of them as "lesser than".........I have, I know. It's the hierarchy of the "haves" and the "have nots".
I have said, "Amen" when the preacher has been at the zenith of his point! Sounded righteous too! Others have done the same. Just sounding righteous. Nothing wrong with saying Amen. Everything wrong with saying Amen when it's for show! I have been guilty of show. You know, sometimes the word spoken just doesn't move me. A reflection on my heart, I know, but it doesn't. I think I'm not listening or caring or something. I need Him to touch me, to take me in to that crowd of the uglies. I am an ugly.
He gave his life for me. When the world sees me as ugly....he doesn't. When I can't go to anyone else...He takes me as I am. Ugly as I am...and loves me anyway. Wow! How can that be?! In Him, I don't have to measure up to other's standards. I just need to look to His. His standards are so much more inviting. If I fall, He is there to pick me up. He never rejects me, never lets me go. When I totally blow it, He doesn't walk away....just says He hasn't forgotten His plan for my life.
I am an Ugly...and He loves me anyway. I haven't known a love like that. I don't deserve a love like that. But it's mine and I'm glad. How could the beautiful embrace the ugly. It's a God Thing....and only that. His embrace around my ugly makes me beautiful...and that pushes me to go embrace others who think they're ugly.
Only God, a loving God, can make the ugly beautiful. He does!
He spoke against the church goers. Said they had a religion that was empty. .....as he put it....full of dead men's bones. No heart, no soul. That made them mad! They plotted to kill him! Jesus, this is Jesus! This is the Son of God we're talking about. He accepted everyone as they were,....and loved them....got nailed for it. In fact, at points...the Word says he wept over them. Imagine, weeping over the refuse of society. He did it!
It amazes me how religion and faith get confused sometimes. You'd think they go together. They mix like oil and water most of the time. Especially when we talk about the Uglies! You know the uglies, all those people that don't measure up to our spiritual standards....hey, let's go further than that....even those people that don't "smell"acceptable. We look at them and immediately think of them as "lesser than".........I have, I know. It's the hierarchy of the "haves" and the "have nots".
I have said, "Amen" when the preacher has been at the zenith of his point! Sounded righteous too! Others have done the same. Just sounding righteous. Nothing wrong with saying Amen. Everything wrong with saying Amen when it's for show! I have been guilty of show. You know, sometimes the word spoken just doesn't move me. A reflection on my heart, I know, but it doesn't. I think I'm not listening or caring or something. I need Him to touch me, to take me in to that crowd of the uglies. I am an ugly.
He gave his life for me. When the world sees me as ugly....he doesn't. When I can't go to anyone else...He takes me as I am. Ugly as I am...and loves me anyway. Wow! How can that be?! In Him, I don't have to measure up to other's standards. I just need to look to His. His standards are so much more inviting. If I fall, He is there to pick me up. He never rejects me, never lets me go. When I totally blow it, He doesn't walk away....just says He hasn't forgotten His plan for my life.
I am an Ugly...and He loves me anyway. I haven't known a love like that. I don't deserve a love like that. But it's mine and I'm glad. How could the beautiful embrace the ugly. It's a God Thing....and only that. His embrace around my ugly makes me beautiful...and that pushes me to go embrace others who think they're ugly.
Only God, a loving God, can make the ugly beautiful. He does!
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