People who have God all figured out scare me. I have been around many of them and the truth is when they tell me about Him, He seems so small after their description. I have trouble serving and bending a knee in worship to their description of God. I don't know what's wrong with me. Most bible believing Christians have God all figured out....I don't. Maybe I took the short bus to discipleship class...I don't know. He is such a mystery to me, He confuses me sometimes. I get frustrated that I don't have all the answers to the questions that some ask me about Him. I look stupid and that makes me mad at Him.
I was reading about Jonah recently and I feel his pain. He was called by God to go preach to the Ninevites. They were a bad lot, about 120,000 of them, and Jonah likened them to the riff raff you would possibly find in a biker bar. To him they were worthless. When he got the call, he ran the other direction. He didn't feel they deserved a message of repentance. I wonder how many times I have looked on someone and said to myself, "You made your bed, now lie in it!" Jonah, I guess, felt kind of the same way about the city of Nineveh. They weren't worth saving, they deserved judgment, they deserved to die and go to hell.
He ran..... God prepared a big fish to have him for lunch.... he was in the fishes belly for 3 days.... he repentented.... went to Nineveh.... preached the message of repentance.... they repented...wow! And he went away pissed because they repentented. Even when angry at God, God took care of him...and I ask why? Shouldn't God have said to Jonah, "You made your bed, now lie in it?" ...then left him to himself?....but that wouldn't be God, huh.
Here's where I don't figure God. He knew....because He knows everything, even before it happens...that Jonah was gonna do all he did, yet he chose Jonah to go do the preaching anyway. Why couldn't He have chosen someone else more compliant, more willing, someone less likely to give argument? I don't get God here....He had other prophets running around that could speak as well as Jonah. They could have done the job and God wouldn't have had to conjure up some big fish as a lesson teacher.
To me those 4 chapters in the Old Testament aren't so much about Jonah as they are about God. I learn that God is hard-headed, yes, that's right....I said it....God is hard-headed. He calls and then doesn't back down. He has already counted the cost too...when He calls, He calls...end of story. So many that totally know Him tell me that God puts those on a shelf who don't do His will.....really? Maybe He just delays their productivity until they go to enough support groups to be in the game again. Jonah did what he did and God still used him for His purposes....He never let go of Jonah. He took, in fact, extreme measures and actions to ensure Jonah fulfilled His call. That gives me hope because I am one of the "called". Haven't felt too much in the game lately but He hasn't quit on me either...because He's hard-headed.....as we have biblically proven...(smirk).
I also learn from these 4 chapters in the Old Testament that no matter how hard I study the 66 books of the bible...no matter how much scripture I can quote....no matter how well I can teach and preach it....I will never fully figure God. There is a part, huge part, of His person I will never fully understand, at least, not in this life. His greatness is beyond my comprehension. Sometimes I have to just throw my hands up and say,"OK, You're being You, I'm not You, so be You and show me where I fit in."
I think the people who personally know and have God figured out are people who also like to have control. Jonah teaches me that I am not in control...He is. He always is in control, even when I think I am. He remains a mystery to me. And yet...that is one of the biggest reasons I worship Him. If I had Him figured out like one of my friends, why would I bend a knee to Him in submission and worship. I don't have a friend yet that I would worship!....although there are a few of them that want me to.
I NEED to worship One who is beyond my strength, my intellect, my will, my circumstances....I bend my knee to Him because He is beyond my little world....and in control of my little world...and worshipping Him gives me hope....and I need hope to live. He uses me....even when I don't think He is....and like Jonah, I get mad when He uses me and I don't want Him to....He uses me anyway.... I need a God like that...who sees beyond me and achieves His purposes...and I have one...and He is the only one...and I'm grateful
