Do You Really Hear Me?

I cry out for help - none is offered.

I beg for peace - I feel only turmoil.

I desire to be clean - I see only dirt.

I want deliverance - I hear the chains rattle.

How did I get here? Wasn't my life blessed, charmed? Wasn't I the one most likely to succeed? Wasn't I the one everyone wanted to be?

Failure, disappointment, hurt, addiction, betrayal, loneliness, torment, faithlessness....are all words and experiences interwoven into the fabric of my life. It seems I'll never again know what it means to be happy, joyful. It appears that the remainder of my life is destined to be littered with losses.

I am encouraged to turn my life and will over to One who is constantly present. At times He seems to be deaf to my cries for help and callous to my tears. God do You really hear me? God, do You truly desire better for me than what I have settled for? Can you save me from this pit I have fallen in?

I hear of those who have courageously praised Him and trusted Him even in the pit. I desire a faith like that. Some need a tough love, others a tough faith....I am in need of both.

Regardless, I will NOT QUIT, I will not run. He is my only hope. I will trust whether He hears or not! I have nowhere else to go....


Written when my faith was as thin as a frayed piece of thread and about as strong.....God is faithful and ever present no matter what our situation and no matter whether we think He hears or not. Keep fighting, keep hoping, keep trusting, and keep praising....the storm makes you stronger and for all your experiences, good or bad, God never wastes them.....Rom.8:28